After nearly 2 months of trying to open a two simple business accounts, I’ve seen first hand how automation and policy ignorance are crushing Britain’s small enterprises when those business do not fit the square pegs that banks seem to think all businesses must fit into. It demonstrates a clear disconnect between purpose, function and reality.
How Banks Are Failing Entrepreneurs
I spent the last week trying to open a business account — something that once took half an hour with a branch manager who knew their customers. Now it’s a digital pantomime.
Every question leads to another bot. Every document upload triggers another “verification.” And when you finally reach a human, they apologise: “The system won’t let us proceed.”
That single line captures Britain’s sickness. We’ve built a financial system where computers say “no” because they were programmed by people who have never started, owned, or even understood a business.
Automation Without Understanding
Banks trumpet their “AI-driven onboarding” and “risk-based compliance models.” In practice, it’s a tangle of rigid algorithms enforcing assumptions that might suit a spreadsheet, but not real life. They look for perfect credit histories, continuous revenue, and pre-existing trade — a fantasy template no genuine start-up fits.
The result is paralysis. Unless you’re already an existing business customer, you can’t speak to a business account manager. Unless you’re already trading, the chatbot refuses to approve an account. And unless you have that account, you can’t legally trade, invoice clients, or register for VAT.
That’s not risk management; it’s a closed circuit of failure.
The Vicious Circle in Practice
This mess has been ongoing since September. The AI doesn’t comprehend that a new business can’t produce trading data before it begins trading. It has no idea what pre-trading expenditure, regulatory compliance, or phased market entry look like. It just rejects applications that don’t fit its model — and the staff are forbidden to intervene.
We’ve created a system that stops entrepreneurs before they start. A system so ill-conceived that honest people are forced to break the rules just to meet them.
Designed by the Wrong People
The deeper issue isn’t the technology — it’s who built it. These automated question sets were designed by compliance teams and tech contractors who have never:
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Started a business from scratch,
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Sought the counsel of someone who has, or
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Successfully run an SME in the UK.
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If they had, the questions would look like this instead:
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Name of principals (with share percentages)
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Contact details for each principal – KYC verified
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Business name and trading name (if different)
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Registered address and contact details
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Companies House registration number
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Business type (Ltd, LLP, Ltd by Guarantee etc.)
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Registered business class(es) with Companies House
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Business activities – a short, plain-English description
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Target market – who you’ll serve
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Projected turnover for Years 1–3
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Expected income streams (domestic, international, grants etc.)
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Foreign-currency receipts? (Y/N)
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Multi-currency accounts required? (Y/N)
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VAT account required? (Y/N)
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Multiple debit cards required? (Y/N)
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Corporate credit card required now or later?
That’s it. Sixteen questions. Enough to understand the business, meet KYC rules, and open an account. No irrelevant “AI-risk” nonsense. Just common sense.
Why It Matters
Small businesses are the life blood of the British economy, Small and medium-sized enterprises (SMEs) make up over 99% of UK businesses and account for about 60% of employment and 48% of business turnover. Specifically, small businesses (0 to 49 employees) alone represent 99.2% of the total business population. Entrepreneurs who start SMEs aren’t asking for handouts; they’re simply asking for access. Every blocked account means lost tax revenue, lost jobs, and lost innovation. If you want more facts, the Federation of Small Businesses has a great fact filled page on their awesome website right here
If the government wants to “get Britain building,” it must start by forcing banks to reopen the gates. Require human review of all declined applications. Restore local discretion. Make every institution explain why it said no.
Final Word
A country that outsources its economic heartbeat to chatbots will find it has no pulse left. Technology should speed up decisions — not replace judgment. Until we rebuild systems shaped by people who’ve lived business life themselves, “computer says no” will remain Britain’s national motto of decline.
This is a follow on article from the post Getting Business Moving Again
This article is part of the British Democratic Alliance’s series on rebuilding Britain’s business ecosystem.
© British Democratic Alliance 2025